Mom by Choice

I have had the unfortunate opportunity to spend quite a few late afternoon's in the waiting room of our pediatrician's office. Andrew's ears are being stubborn, poor guy. For all of you mom's out there, you'll understand what an interesting experience this can be!



You meet and learn about all types of children, and most importantly, their parents. Being a mother of son's I always wonder what my life will be in 10 years. Will my boys still smile at me the instant they see me, will Jackson still tell me his secrets and dreams at 14?



Day one of four: I see two other people sitting in the "sick kid" side of the office. One a women in her forties who is dozing in the chair, as if she hasn't slept in years. Two a boy, probably 13 across the lobby with his hat over his eyes, which are covered by his hands. Obviously, not feeling the best. These two are not speaking, and quite honestly, I didn't realize they were even together. Other mom's were coming in and out, but these two remained. They sat, they dozed, but they never once spoke...until she woke. "Do you feel better yet?" "No, my head still hurts." " You SHOULD have taken Motrin at home!", she rolls her eyes...stupid kid?!*& "Uh, huh" was his only response.



Day four of four: A mother and son, who I learned was 10, sit down next to me in the "sick kid" lobby. By now, I am thinking, please don't cough, breathe or speak to me...I have had enough of this routine and place! I was grumbily. He, once again, was obviously sick and lethargic. But this time his mom was engaged, talking about how nice the St. Patty's day four leaf clovers were hanging from the ceiling. Wondering how his day was, how he was feeling, what he would like to do when he got home. Did he need help catching up with his homework? Did he want to stop at the store to pick up something that sounded good to eat tonight? And I turned to see what his response was, he was smiling through his discomfort...and answering her questions. You could instantly tell that she gave no other option. She encouraged him through his sometimes negative answers, lifting him up to the point of smiles. She was a mother of sons. They began to interact with Andrew, who was drawn to this pleasant boy. And we began to talk, she shared that she had two sons, another that was 12. How much she enjoyed them and how close they were now. I learned that she had always worked, and always strives to maintain an open relationship with the boys, even when it was hard. I learned so much from this stranger in the 15 minutes we spent talking, she was put there for me on that grumbily day.



I choose to be that type of mom, that no matter what type of day, no matter the hours in my day that we share...to take the time to really "see" who they are and what they are about. And instead of trying to mold them in to something that I want them to be I will accept and embrace who they truly are. I can only hope that someday years from now, my boys will look at me and smile and say, " I may need some help with my English tonight, mom."